Archive for April, 2014

You may never see her wearing a sexy skirt to a party or discussing her broken nails. You will spot her preferring beer mugs over Negroni cocktail. Forget about the pink sandals; you will see her wearing grey shoes even on a hot date. And yet –whether good or bad-she manages to draw right amount of attention from every corner of the room. Yes, I am talking about your gal pals who can never fit into the category of refined, high-heeled girls. Theoretically, they are referred as Tomboyish girls. Tomboys mostly tend to think, behave and talk like men. So it should not marvel you if they are ruthlessly straightforward, talk about gadgets, indulge in sports, resist typical feminine qualities, and share a ‘bromance’ kind of rapport even with their male friends.


One will seldom come across a tomboy petulant about the colour of her nail paint, spa sessions, hair extensions or the attire she is going to wear in the next party. They are exceedingly direct and unadulterated in nature. She can advise you how to pacify your ultra glam girlfriend and also borrow your pyjama if needed. Their “don’t care” attitude often makes them the best friend to any girl or guy. However, on many occasions, people tend to assume too many wrong things or behave erroneously while dealing with a tomboy.

To being with, a large number of guys presume that tomboys have no inclination towards passion and love. Even if she is not a high maintenance woman when it comes to fashion or jewellery, it does not make her any less woman. There is strong unexplored desire in her to be treated with reverence and sensitivity. Underneath the shorts and sneakers, there is a lady who probably enjoys a sense of security when she gets attention from men. But, sadly, men are fascinated with the idea of having an ultra glam woman as their arm candy while a tomboyish girl is only looked upon as his “best friend” in times of need.


Secondly, owing to their lack of “girly-girl” approach, tomboys are often mislabelled or perceived as lesbians. God never created a hard and fast rule that only those girls who talk about pink clothes and lipsticks deserve to be called straight. Being a homosexual is a personal choice and it has nothing to do with your likes or dislikes. It is a downright insult to someone’s individuality if you categorize tomboyish girls like that. She may have a hard shell, but she dotes on her friends and confides in them. After all, deep within she is a loving and compassionate person just like other girls. And only a wise and sensitive man can prove to her that stereotypes do not define their mental periphery.


Thirdly, our movies tend to glint a misconception that a tomboyish girl undergoes lot of physical transformation once she falls in love. This is completely wide of the mark. Of course positive changes are always welcome, but in terms of conventional feminist qualities, a tomboy is aware of what she is and that is why there is a confidence that there is no need to change herself for anyone on this earth. If you feel that you can “fix” her once she falls in love with you then think again. If you really want her, let her know that you are okay with what she is. Never ask her to change and who knows she may wear a dress for u someday on her own.


If you get threatened by her bold nature then remember all the edgy, untamed energy she brought to your life in the first place. There is no doubt that a conventional girlfriend and a tomboy will be like chalk and cheese. However, the basic idea is to let every individual feel comfortable and, if you happen to date a tomboy, gradually allow her charisma to spread love like any other girl.


Disclaimer: All pictures are a result of Google search and I have no copy right over them.


The idea of writing this new post struck me when, out of boredom, I was watching a telemarketing program this morning. I don’t exactly remember the product’s name (and thank god for that), but it endorsed a “life-changing” skin cream that could make you fair in just 10 days. Strangely, this head-banging ordeal did not stop just there; the ad further depicted a life situation where a “sawnli ladki” walks into an office for the purpose of giving an interview, and in parallel to her, a woman with a flawless “fair” skin comes too. No prizes for guessing who got the job. The girl with the amazing “gorapan and nikhar” had the offer letter in her hand by the end of the advertisement.


The admakers made it more attention-grabbing by taking the help of a fairness meter! Oh Yes, you read it right? There is actually a magic card to measure the fairness of your skin because it has got the different skin shades embedded on it. Irrespective of the technological advancement, it is heartbreaking to see, we fall prey to these plastic cards and magic potions on a daily basis. It becomes more offensive when I see celebrities endorsing these fairness creams and continuously drilling a theory into our head that it is easy for fairer people to win a beauty pageant, woo a girl, get a job—in short achieve anything in life.

All my life I have been an ardent worshipper of Shahrukh Khan because I admired the way his willpower and determination shaped his career path despite not having a godfather. However, now when I see him giving all the credit of his success to a fairness cream just for earning some quick money, I get annoyed and baffled at the same time.


According to these people, all the potential achievements in this world are stored in a small tube of Rs. 5. What an amazing theory, isn’t it? Going by this theory, working hard for success is an old-school concept now. All we need to do now is buy a fairness cream. It is really a time to ponder where our advertisement and marketing industry is heading. People need to analyze that if there was even an ounce of truth to these claims then all Indian women would have turned fair by now.


In fact, truth to be told, none of us have come across even one person till today who got married, cracked a job interview or achieved success because of his/her skin colour. Surely our stupidity is paving the way of luxury for many admakers. The lives of Nelson Mandela, Obama, Oprah, Bipasha Basu, Nandita Das, Rajnikanth are an overt testimony that fairness is nowhere related to accomplishment. The feeling of being beautiful and self-confident comes from within and no product can ever bring that out for you.

Sadly no one is willing to understand that love is devoid of any skin colour and so is success!!!!!


Disclaimer: All pictures are a result of Google search and I have no copyright over them.

Ever wondered what the ‘Ungli’ of a common man can do?

With an aim to grab the pulse of the voters in this election season, Vebbler-a popular social networking site-has launched an innovative movement called the ‘Ungli Campaign’. This campaign aims to bring hundreds of campuses into voting booths in this election. I usually do not encourage any kind of promotion or endorsement on my blog, but when I was asked to promote such a noble thought of Voting, I just couldn’t say no.

It can be considered the first ever platform where individuals can engage in political discussions/opinions with voters, activists, NGO’s, political parties –all under one platform. In order to kick start the promotion, The Ungli Song’ was launched which features Shibani Kashyap and The Band of Boys. What’s more, celebrities like Arbaaz Khan, Sonu Sood, and Prachi Desai showed their support to the campaign by featuring in the video.


The campaign was covered extensively by the Times of India, and interestingly, just within 15 hours of its launch, the song received more than 1500 youtube views. Here is a link to the song:

Enough has been said about the significance of voting for uplifting the remorseful condition of our state. I will not preach any more. Just one thought-  If you want to bring a positive change, get off the couch, and please vote instead of complaining for the next 20 years. You do not have any right to criticize the loopholes until you get your finger inked. My itch to vote still has to wait till 12 MAY 2014. Can’t wait to be part of the CHANGE!

Disclaimer: The picture is a part of Google search and I do not have any copyright over it!

From all the millions of reason for not liking Monday mornings, I hate one reason the most; I have to wake up at 6 in the morning and opt for a local train journey to come back to my PG so that I can continue with my professional life conveniently. Often this 2 hours long train journey serves as a vantage point to see and observe many things which stirs the tempestuous side of me. Yesterday was one such day for me. Unlike my punctual days, I was few minutes late today and was almost on the verge of missing it, but all thanks to the runner inside me, I made it. With a victorious smile, I made my way into the mini stampede of train. And, thus, started my sweat induced journey.


I seated myself opposite to a couple. I assumed that because they were holding hands and it is a universal truth that you cannot see brother-sister, friends or colleagues holding hands and sitting like that. So you cannot question me in that department. Both of them seemed to be in their early 30s. I was taking out headphone from my bag when suddenly the man stood up and started searching something; first in his pockets and then in his bag. Seeing him restless his wife/girlfriend couldn’t control herself.

“What happened? Whats wrong? What exactly are you searching?”

“Shit! Shit! Shit! I dropped the flat’s key somewhere while coming I guess.” The man replied

The woman’s face turned red. “What nonsense! How can you be so irresponsible? This is going to bring so much of trouble. Calling the spare key makers and letting the security man know, etc etc.”

This infuriated the man more. “Wait a minute yaar. At least let me think. I am losing my breath already.”

“Fine”. The girl took a break of 5 seconds before bursting out into a hopeful remark, “Hey, as far as I remember your mother has a spare key of our flat. You remember you gave her one for emergency purposes. She lives hardly an hour from our place. Please call her and ask for help or else when do you expect to find a key maker if we return from office at 10. Moreover, tomorrow is holiday for Poila Boishak (Bengali New Year) “

With this statement I gathered two things about both of them. One–the boy stayed away from his mother despite staying in the same city. Two–the couple were staying together in their newly acquired flat for some time now. Call me the inquisitive neighbour or nosy aunty, but I always have this habit to observe what the people near me are up to. You never know what may give an inspiration to pick up the pen and start writing. My calligraphy thoughts were interrupted with a grumpy look on the man’s face.

“No. I can’t call her. Let it be. It’s fine. We will manage.”

“Oh C’mon. You are not asking her for money or anything. It’s just a key. If needed, we can go to her instead of asking her to come to us. This sounds decent too. Right? The woman seemed hell bent to convince her man.

“You do not understand my point Poonam. If in these 8 months she didn’t find any reason to call me then even I don’t have the inclination to mollycoddle her ego. Besides, tomorrow is a holiday for Poila Boishak. We will go to Mohit’s place at night. Calm down” The man put his hand on her shoulder to pacify her. But she continued with a poignant face.

“At least one call from your end will give us redemption from all this helter-skelter pattern of the new year celebration. Remember we had so many cooking plans. And now you want to spoil it all by going to Mohit’s place. Think again.”

Finally she had to face the heat when he replied, “Okay. Cool. If you are so eager to do this then use your instinctive side and make the call yourself because I am not doing it.”

“Yes. I can definitely call her because I am not as cagey as you. Give me a second“. She took out her phone and started searching for a number.

“Hello. Ma. This is Poonam. Hope I have not disturbed you. Yes I am fine. Actually we are in a problem.”

The man gave her a nasty look at the mention of “we” and started signalling her to say just “I”. She grasped what he wanted to say and continued again.

“Oh I mean I am in deep trouble. While coming to office this morning, I dropped our flat keys somewhere and since tomorrow is a holiday it would get very messy to search for a key maker. I know you have a spare key. Is it okay for you if I come to your place and get the key? Only if you say yes ma.” She dropped the phone in a second and looked at the man.

He said with an unforgiving expression, “I told you not to call her. Now, she must have again said something awful about our relationship, or worst, she might have asked me to go to her place. I don’t know when you will start behaving wisely.” He continued to rant when his phone rang. His aplomb appearance suddenly changed to disbelief. “It’s Ma”. He said and picked up.


“Hello. Yes I am Amol. It’s Amol here. Yaaa..Tell me.”

He kept repeating “Ya” “Amol” and “Yes” for couple of seconds more. Perhaps he was too stunned to respond. It took him a minute more to respond normally, but I could hear only this much.

“Yes the same key. Poonam will come to you if you want or even I can come. What? Why will you? It’s fine. Don’t bother…………arrrr……………… remember? …….Okay office cancelled then I am coming to pick you up. Bye. See you in some hours. “

I was unable to hear what the person on the other end of the phone was saying, but I knew some kind of reconciliation was definitely on the cards. The curiosity of the nosy aunty in me was quenched when the woman started with her series of questions.

“Wooow. Finally you spoke to her. What happened? Is she coming to us or are we going to her? Tell me everything.”

For the first time in these 45 minutes I saw him smiling. “We are not going office today. Let’s get down at the next station. First, we will pick her up along with the spare key, and then bring her to home and celebrate the New Year tomorrow together. She is going to make payesh and biriyani for both of us.”

I saw a tear trickle down her face. “Seeeeeee..I told you that…………….” She wanted to say more, but was stopped by him, “Shhhhhh…lets get down first and then talk. Lot of things to say”

At the next station, they bid adieu to the boring office for a day and, I guess, headed towards something more concrete and indispensable.

Often, the intricate situations of life, makes it a notch harder to change perceptions and we tend to formulate a string of opinions –good or bad–about the people who are connected to us. The philosophy this ‘Spare Key’ trots out is suitable for all times. We ‘lock’ our feelings in a coop and throw the spare key in an ocean of pessimism and mistrust, negating all the good moments shared with the person in question. It took one phone call for Amol and Poonam to get back both the SPARE KEYS back- one for the flat and one for the admiration of his mother.


My station came. I got down. However, couldn’t cease to look for a SPARE KEY that could unlock the stumbling block of my psyche in every situation. Hope someday I will get a help for that too. 🙂


Disclaimer: All pictures used are a result of Google search and I have no copyright over them.



I will not mince words this time. I couldn’t sleep last night properly. The statement of chief of the political party Samajwadi Party kept echoing in my mind. Often we hear politicians giving controversial statements with a clear intention to gather attention from different sections of the country. After this, well articulated debates are held on various news channels, the newspapers are filled with feature articles regarding it, and it just takes few hours and a McDonald’s burger to get out of the disturbing phase. Today, it’s different.

Mulayam Singh Yadav crossed every line of civilization and compassion this time. A politician, who once held the position of Chief Minister of Uttar Pradesh, and now, boasts of limitless political muscle power, made a statement that is nothing short of demeaning, insensitive, dehumanizing, and brutally misogynistic. Saying – “Rape accused should not be hanged. Boys make mistakes.” – left every individual of this country in a state of acrimony. For a second, I thought I heard something wrong and maybe I need to get to the bottom of this news again. But, to my dismay, he actually had the temerity to say what he said.


Do you know what a rape victim and her family has to go through? If some day your daughter or wife, god forbid, goes through it then you would know how big the ‘mistake’ is! A rape victim is unwillingly forced to live with a damaged self esteem for the rest of her life. The social stigma and prolonged judiciary system just adds to her misery. You make someone dead by her soul and call it a bloody MISTAKE! In the times when we are considering nothing less than a deterrent punishment for the rapists, you are mouthing some illogical statements to support the action of rapists. Do you deserve to be called a human being? In fact, this is not enough. There is an incessant list of ‘mistakes’ did by your party. You and your little boys have been ‘raping’ our country for many years, and still there is no closure to it.

We still haven’t forgotten how IAS officer Durga Shakti Nagpal was fired just because she demanded the demolition of an illegitimate mosque wall. Later, the suspension was retracted because of too much public outrage. Another little ‘mistake’ done in the tenure of Uttar Pradesh Chief Minister Akhilesh Yadav’s (your boy) tenure was the ghastly communal riots of Muzaffarnagar that killed/injured hundreds of people. And when thousands of riot victims were struggling to commence a new life in relief camps, you and your CM son were enjoying watching women dance in a “Bollywood Night” extravaganza at the SaiFi Festival.




Yadav’s statement is surely excruciating, but now our duty as the potential voter starts after this. We cannot afford to elect leaders like him because it will not only encourage rape, but will also disregard the very theory of democracy. By defying the new anti-rape law, Yadav has brought into light a gruesome mentality that can turn the sensibilities of people into dust.

I strongly support Kiran Bedi when she says, “This statement is not just against women, it is against the society. He should be punished with no votes.” Today, the time has come to stir our conscience once again and vote only to the party which can deliver what is expected out of it; a leader who will not say boys will be boys because a real gentleman is one who allows the fellow countrymen to breath in peace, respect and dignity. And, Yadav ji, DIGNITY and RESPECT are some words that you are still not familiar with.


Disclaimer: All pictures used are a result of Google search and I have no copyright over them.


We love wearing jeans, isn’t it? It not only makes us feel comfortable, but also let us slip our wallet, phone or any other essential item into it peacefully, eliminating the need to carry a bag separately on most occasions. Of course it assists to elevate your trifling fashion sense as well. Of late the purpose of wearing jeans has gone several steps beyond style and has led to the advent of a fashion blooper called Baggy Jeans. For those who are unaware of this term—though have seen its effect everywhere around them, Baggy Jeans are wide leg jeans that are relatively loose and relaxing around the waist and thighs.


Sporting a Baggy style is considered one of the most trendy things today. All style is good with me until, in the ploy of getting a fashionable look, your baggy jeans starts sliding down to reveal your butt cracks. Oh! This is the most nauseating view I get these days, and unfortunately the frequency of such sights are escalating by leaps and bounds. Wherever you go–a shopping mall, restaurant, theater, pub, office–you are likely to bump into at least one person who is ready to show you his vital assets via his low-waist jeans. I think by now I can recognize any lad of my city with his butt type!

I never knew that now the time has come when fashion actually means wearing a low waist baggy jeans and bending everywhere at the drop of a hat, and baaaamm showing your out-of-shape hip bone. These low waist jeans clad men are always a topic of discussion amongst girls. Well, don’t get excited because we just wait for you to bend down while getting a snooker shot, and—controlling our giggles—count the seconds/minutes/hours you take to get back your sanity and pull them up. If the lady luck is on our side, we can also witness your jeans touching up to your knee with élan. Whom are you kidding dude? Do you actually think girls would get impressed with such an outrageous fashion sense and those crude views? If yes, then I really need to surprise you with a reality check!


Try to analyze yourself that whether the floral underwear is classy enough to be flaunted. Moreover, in any part of the world you go, JOCKAY, NOIKE, GAEP and POMA will never get the recognition of international brands. If you are so fascinated to flaunt your underwear then for god’s sake wear an authentic brand like JOCKEY, NIKE, GAP and PUMA, and please spare us the horror. I am never against the idea of baggy jeans, but sweetheart you need to understand that showing butt cheeks is not even remotely close to being sexy. Irrespective of your good physique and charming face, butt crack in public is always looked upon in pure disgust.

If you want to justify your ‘flasher’ approach with air space and comfort then opt for the desi Lungi next time. At least you will get enough air down there and, thanks to Honey Singh, you may also break into a Lungi Dance whenever required. Next time, kindly pull up the pants and keep your underwear out of sight before your manhood comes out in public with a powerful gust of wind.


If you can’t afford to get rid of this so called Cool Style Quotient, then please get a BELT!

P.S: This post is issued in public interest.


Disclaimer: All pictures are a result of Google search!


This was the first question my father asked me after my last exam of final year graduation. This was not to clip my wings after my studies got over; instead he wanted to check whether or not I have any ambition left in life. No matter how much peculiar it may sound now, but the conversation followed something like this:

Dad: What are your plans now?

Me: Ummm..nothing I will wait for the graduation certificate. I am supposed to get it after two months.

Dad: No. I mean what do you want to do after your graduation? Any particular plans? Do you want to work after marriage?

Me: Ohh that! Nothing much Papa. I am already 20 so I will wait for 1 or 2 years more, and then get married.

Dad: What NONSENSE! What are you saying?

Me: Hey Papa. Don’t get angry. I will get married only to the guy you approve for me. Bas, khush?

Dad: What is wrong with you? I am not annoyed for the kind of alliance you would be gifting me with! I am shocked to hear such regressive thoughts from your mouth. After a graduation degree in biotechnology and a decent percentile in all board exams, all you could think is MARRIAGE! Shame on you.

Me: But, what’s the big deal Papa. I don’t have any plans and at least marriage will make my life more happening. Who would want to slog in an organization from 9 to 6? At least not me!

Dad: Do whatever you want! I can’t think of anything at this moment.

Yes. This is what exactly happened in the summer of 2008. Many of you would be giggling after reading this. While many of you would be shocked that how can a girl talk so idiotically to her father? I still have to come to terms with the fact that it’s been 6 years to that conversation. And today 7th of April 2014, I have completed my four years of professional life. Even though it is not a noteworthy time span for many professionals, but for the kind of person I was, this is something huge.


I don’t know when and how this career-inclined revolution happened with me, but it undeniably brought out the best in me over all these years. Though I have no right to say this, but today when I see many of my classmates sacrificing their career after their marriage I feel very gloomy and stressed. In their own words “Marriage brings responsibilities. Besides, I have no paucity of money to struggle in office for 7-8 hours.” This sounds quite familiar to what I used to think some time ago. But, I refuse to believe this today. Because I know one thing that you cannot associate a job only with money. It would be a downright insult to an establishment that has plethora of things to offer apart from money.

How many times do you see a woman talking about her career, new found job, challenges faced at workplace, or the perks/recognition that comes her way during her tenure at a company? Certainly not many times! The only thing women know, now, is endlessly updating pictures of their kids. Of course putting up pictures is not a crime, but one must know to think beyond that. Women are unquestionably capable of much more. We have a life of our own–an individual identity.

Our life is an anomalous fusion of different moments. Some days are going to be bad while some days are going to be bad. Apart from providing an inner creative satisfaction, your job saves you from the regular monotony and boredom of life by giving you an outlet. You do not sit back thinking the new designer salwar kamiz, for instance, purchased by your neighbour and what can you do next to be at par with her fashion style. You are able to put your energy into better use. Fallow energies tend to divert us from the real purpose of our lives, making us feel miserable at every stage. The idle time hangs on our mind pointlessly in the absence of a work.

In addition, a job shapes your personality by helping you to learn new skills and things. You keep challenging yourself to better your previous work. And a polished and busy mind is far more active and dynamic. Even the people near you get infected with your full of zip kind of approach to life. What’s more, the learned skills can be used by you as a contribution to society and community. Every person who is working in a particular field is a productive citizen who is doing his/her bit of duty to help the society with their knowledge.

Last but not the least, a career gives you the much needed dignity and self-respect that you require to survive in a world that operates more on identity and recognition. You will no longer be just called as the daughter of your father, wife of your husband or mother of your kids. It forms a solid foundation of your individuality and makes you more responsible of your actions. I have too much respect for women who single-handedly take care of their family, but with little dedication if you are able to channelize your energy and extra time to more productive things, and ultimately support family by paying your bills, then isn’t it a good idea to balance our focus on the household chores with the real challenges of life?


Those who are already working, try to respect the line of work that gives you so much more than money. I wish people understood that every profession comes with certain demands and it is futile to sulk about it day and night. May be the work you are doing now is not something you thought of, but the idea is not to lose hope and gradually find something that you are truly passionate about 🙂

Disclaimer: All pictures are a result of Google search!

Recently I was having a healthy discussion with my juniors regarding the upcoming elections, latest movie releases, and their reviews. I didn’t realize when the course of the discussion took a perceptive turn and I ended up coming up with some profound details and possibilities. Suddenly, a girl told me “Are all writers like this or you are an exception?” Another one added, “Arey aap to creative type ke ho. These people are like this only.” I didn’t realize whether that was a flattering remark or a spiteful comment at that time, but later when I sat down to think, I was quite pleased with the conundrum that was attached to it.


I am not a self-proclaimed creative person because personally, I believe, everyone is born with a creative streak. Howbeit, while growing up, some hone their creativity by thinking out of the box, and some forget that they had something like this in the first place. Creativity works in mystifying and often contradictory ways. Although creative thinking is a constant, significant characteristic, it may suffer a setback based on situation and perspective. On some occasion, inspiration and thoughts crop up out of nowhere, and when you need them the most they refuse to show up. As per my observation, creative personality types are highly complicated people because they do not tend to get attached to a fixed habit; one day you would see them talking a lot on almost every subject, and the other day you would find them seeking solitude desperately. Some days you would find them highly alert, and some days you would be baffled to witness their daydreaming episodes endlessly.

Even though there are no typical ‘creative type’ characteristics, you can distinguish a creative mind from a normal mind by these standard traits:

Observation and Curiosity

People who tend to think differently are greedy with the notion of knowing each and everything. They have an inclination to understand human psychology better so they want to know every why, when, how and where. For them, there is never an end to learning. So, they try to satisfy the complexities and contradictions of human mind by grasping whatever comes in their way. Not necessarily every time, but if you have a colleague or friend who has a habit of questioning, observing and writing down on a notebook or laptop after a new experience, you must know that you are dealing with an imaginative mind.


Solitude and Peace

One of the most unique traits of a creative mind is fearlessness. They are not afraid to stay alone. In fact, they find their own company very uplifting. In order to open the mind to constructive things and think profoundly, creative people make perfect use of solitude. It is very difficult to listen to your creative voice amidst all the daily chaos of life. Loneliness is one of the few ways that let them get in touch with their inner self.


Traumatic events acts as a catalyst for them

It is a proven fact that the majority of success stories came into existence only after pain and heartbreak. An artist takes the hardships of life in stride and uses them as a catalyst to show a considerable creative growth. Their spiritual thought process and personal strength allows them to sense new possibilities in life. In fact, their passion for a particular art becomes a cathartic process to take out the cynicism and have a different standpoint on reality.


Not afraid to take risks

The ‘creative types’ are always enthusiastic to take risks in diverse facets of their lives. This is because sticking to a routine will make their judgment monotonous and stagnant. They always have the guts to tread paths that not many have explored before. As a result, they will always have exclusive ideas under their belt even if it means going out of the way and defying the standard norms. They know how to downplay a situation and wiggle their way out it.

Contrary to what people believe, nurturing a creative mind requires a lot of hard work, dedication, meditation and conviction. You cannot demean it by simply calling it a God’s gift. They are normal people like us, but creativity is an unusual liberating and idiosyncratic process. In retrospect, it is better to let them have a soul-searching analysis to harness the congenital power of mind and keep their mojo up.


Disclaimer: All photographs used are result of Google search.